Hypnosis Training Video #501: No Such Thing As A “Bad” Week for Hypnosis Clients
How to expertly handle the common situation where a client has a perceived "bad week"
Our clients come to us with a variety of problems, and most of them didn't just start the day before the came to see you! Even after great hypnosis work with your client, it doesn't mean that things will go perfectly.
Part of what happens is our negativity bias - it's natural to focus on the negative.
We have what psychologists call a negativity bias - we are programmed to see the "negative" in everything we do. It's biological, and it's helped to keep us alive. However, many of our clients are so focused on the negative, that they don't recognize their own success!!
This is how I explain negativity bias to my clients "Imagine that it's thousands of years ago, and you're walking along and a saber-toothed tiger starts chasing you. You start running, but then you see a nice, shiny apple. Now if you stopped to pick the apple, you'd likely be eaten by the tiger and die. That's negativity bias at it's simplest, and it is a normal and natural, biological, part of our brain. But we can over ride it and need to override it if it's causing us problems."
Not all "bad weeks" have to do with a negativity bias however - sometimes a bad week can just be a bad experience or situation, one that may not have anything to do with what you're helping your client with. For example, a client's employer decides to lay-off half of the workforce. Your client still has a job, but now with twice the work and feels guilty about it on top of that because she still has a job.
WHAT TO DO ? Help Clients Recognize Success and focus on the positive
It's common for our clients to only focus on the negative because of their negativity bias, so there are a few things to do, use as appropriate :
Say, "Don't worry - I know exactly what to do".
This puts your client at ease, and helps them feel as if they didn't do anything wrong, meaning there is nothing wrong with them.
With my clients, they know they're coming in for more than one session, so I may add "this is why we do multiple sessions - you've been suffering from this for a while and it can take more than one session to resolve all of the aspects of it."
Use this case when something actually did go entirely wrong, meaning they had a bad week because of something unexpected. For example, crisis at home or work.
It can be unrelated to the work you are doing with them - remember just because clients are coming in for hypnosis and we're helping them with great techniques and new lines of thinking and feeling, the world is still a stressful place for most people. This is where redirecting them to what did work that week (even if it was chaotic) is helpful.
Say, "Let's start with you telling me what worked for you this week"
Refocus the client on what worked this week. It's common for clients to come in and report what didn't work. This brings it back to the work you do with them and helping them to recognize they can still make progress even when unexpected bad things happen.
Use the Incident as a Teaching Moment
The other option to consider that could be used in conjunction with either or both of the above, is to use the incident to help your client learn, here's how :
Say, "if you could do that all over again, would you do it any different?". Then get your clients input. Perhaps they would do it differently, then get the learning : "good, put an ending on this, I've changed because now I know _____________, put an ending on this I've changed because now I feel ______________. Good so now I can ______________. Good"
Watch the episode below for details on how to handle a client having a perceived "bad week", then continue reading for how to handle it in the hypnosis session.
NEXT, Use Age Regression or Age PROGRESSION in Session with Client to Have them "re-do" what happened with a better response
If it makes sense for your client - meaning they wish they responded to the incident more appropriately, then use hypnosis to help them practice that.
Here's how :
Say, "In a moment, I'm going to count from 3 back to 1, and when I get to 1 you're going to be at work all over again, right before your boss made the unfair comment to you. This time, you're going to handle it exactly like you want, staying composed and happy. 3, 2, 1, be there."
Allow the client to re-live that experience with their new insight, then take them into the future with Age Progression, and have them experience a similar situation that they also now handle properly.
The Meta Message : Ultimately, we want our clients to understand they are in charge of their response
What we really want for our clients, is to know they are in charge of how they respond, then teach them techniques and tools to help them respond the way they want to any situation. This means clients leave with peace of mind knowing that no matter what comes up they can deal with it. That is the meta message - you are good, you are lovable, and you can deal with things that happen in life. This brings tremendous peace and joy to our clients, and it's really what we're teaching them.
A "BAD WEEK" is a good thing
Our clients having a perceived "bad week" can be a good thing. It gives us the opportunity to help our clients reframe it, flip it around, have a better response, and really who better to help them when they have a bad week than their hypnotist?
Did you know we do hypnosis with heart at Cascade Hypnosis Center for Training & Services? It's not easy to help people with some of life's biggest issues, but if your heart is in the right place, then the training can help you to help people with really deep and hurtful things they're suffering from.