Simple IS Effective with Guest Mary Hayes, Professional Hypnotist on Living Hypnotically
What first got you started in wanting to be a hypnotist?
Mary explains that she was a big worrier, and it was starting to really affect herself and her loved ones. She'd often jump to the worst case scenario, or worry about if she needed insulin for her diabetes.
She started searching for ways to get help and quickly found hypnosis and hypnosis training at Cascade Hypnosis Training.
What benefits did you receive from being a hypnosis client before becoming a hypnotists?
Mary appreciated how powerful hypnosis is. She's a very research heavy person and was impressed with what she found while researching hypnosis. She discovered that with hypnosis she could regain control to be able to notice her feelings, but react in the way that she wanted to.
She learned how much being a worrier was making everything harder, but with hypnosis found deep confidence in herself and her abilities. It was empowering to know that the answers were inside and just needed a little help from a professional hypnotist.
Now when she helps clients, she loves seeing how much change is possible with each client. Not only do they get support with their issue, but there's a wave of other positive changes that follow.
Can you share a client story with us?
Mary shares a recent client she's been working with that was having troubles at school. She's older than the average college student, and in a difficult program that was filling her with doubt that she was doing the right thing.
Before they even had their first session together, Mary gave her a tool to start working with. It is an exercise in simply telling yourself "Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better," from French psychologist Émile Coué.
She was really receptive to that tool, and arrived at the first session with great enthusiasm to get started.
Through research that Mary has done, she's found several simple tools that she uses herself, and shares with her clients. These tools make it easier to coexist with complex emotions. Combined with working with a professional hypnotist who can help you find the root cause of why these hard feelings happen, it becomes easier to recognize the feelings (NOT suppress them), and feel confident in working through them. You'll know that you'll be okay and that you're safe and capable.
How do you live hypnotically?
Recently Mary was struggling with racing thoughts because she had so much to do! She was able to use 7th Path Self-Hypnosis® at bed time to help quiet her mind and get to sleep. She also uses breathing techniques, and auto suggestions to slow down for a moment to stop the racing thoughts, and feel in control again. Often it only takes a few seconds to get back in control!
When slowing down, we don't always need to generate amazing insights. Sometimes the best thing is to create a little space and feel peace for a few moments.
What would you want to say to your potential future clients?
The best way to start with hypnosis is to work with a professional hypnotists. There are a lot of good hypnotists, but one that specializes in 5-PATH is great. Do some research and make sure they have good training and good referrals. And remember that it's not just about working with the hypnotist, but getting techniques that you'll take with you to practice in your day-to-day life.
What do you find important to share with clients before working with them?
I want them to know that they may not realize it at this time, but with a little bit of help, they have the solutions within themselves.
Mary shares that it's always possible to move forward and have a better quality of life. And we can get there quickly and powerfully.
She also states the importance of making sure clients understand that they have to do the work to get the changes they want. She's not a magician than can just magic away their problems while they sit there. It is essential to get an agreement from the client that they will use the techniques she's shares outside of their sessions. She's done a lot of research, and understands that people will gravitate towards different techniques, but they have to be willing to use them. She always offers clarification and sessions notes so that her clients understand exactly what they're working on.
Tell us about your upcoming book.
Mary is soon releasing her book Elevate Your Happiness: Science-based Natural Techniques for the DIYer. For each technique in the book she gives an intro about it, how to turn it up a notch, and her personal experience with the technique.
Part two of the book also goes through traditional and alternative therapies, and also how hypnosis promotes wellness.
What would you say to anyone thinking about being a hypnotists?
It is life-changing! Even with your very first client, you'll feel so positively about being able to help people work through some of their hardest issues. It's incredibly rewarding to have a profession that truly helps change people's lives, while also being able to support yourself as a career. Mary highly recommends it!
How can people connect with you?
People can find Mary at www.ClearPathHypnosis.com. She wants people to know that most of her sessions are done online, and are extremely effective. Her website has her phone number and email address to be able to connect with her.
And her book will be out very soon!
Are you interested in becoming a hypnotist?
Get a free copy of Can You Be A Hypnotist? by Erika Flint, and Start hypnotizing with our first hypnosis lesson free now, at www.CanYouBeAHypnotist.com.
Erika: What first, got you started in wanting to be a hypnotist?
Mary: Really the, first thing is I was, like I think many of my clients, searching on the internet for things. My thing was worry. I was I was a worrier and a worrier where a thought would come off and outta nowhere and I'd follow it and follow it and to the point of where mentally and physically in my stomach, in my, I would feel, it would make changes and I saw that it was beginning to affect my relationships with those I loved. Cause of course those were the ones people that I worried about the most. It was really worrying about those I loved was probably my biggest thing. And I didn't, I'm, I am. I wanna be as healthy as I can. I'm a type one diabetic. I take insulin because I need that. So it's not that I don't believe in medicine, but I don't wanna take things unless I really feel I, I really need to. And I saw hypnosis come up and I started looking, and then I started looking some more. And I saw your site and I go, Ooh. And becoming someone who can help others do it.
So I, so it was two different things. And I will say as I sort of went on, I guess I'll call it a bit of a tangent, as that pole grew of being trained to be a hypnotist. And after I was trained right after I was a client of hypnosis which I think was amazingly important. Yeah, to have that experience.
Erika: Good call.
Mary: It was really, yes, it was great.
Erika: And what would you say you got out of that, doing him being a client after you got trained?
Mary: Understanding how powerful it really is. It really all, everything I read, I did a lot of research. I'm a very research oriented person, right? And I was like, okay, this hypnosis is it.
My first question was, is it real? Is it really something? And I said, I, and the more evidence-based, I said it's, I think it's really something. And I learned more. Then when I experienced myself. This worrying thing was something I knew rationally was not a healthy thing for myself and my relationship.
Yeah. But, I wasn't, I didn't know, I didn't know how to take control. I didn't stop it. I didn't.
Erika: Yeah. And that's, a lot of our clients know what they don't. They, know consciously they either shouldn't be eating or they shouldn't be drinking. They, know Absolutely. But it's, it's the ability to, in the moment, either not do what they don't wanna do or do, what they do want to do. So you are now after the hypnosis, you're noticing now, what happened to that? What happened to those thoughts? What did you notice after hypnosis?
Mary: Uh, I, know that it one thing. I know that I don't, that I have control to not follow them. When they do come, they still come sometimes, of course I, still worry about sometimes things happen in my loved one's life that is cause for concern, but I don't have to follow it to the worst possible outcome.
Erika: Was that ever useful?
Mary: No. It doesn't help me and it also doesn't help. I thought me doing that was that it, like I needed to do it. You know what it gave me, confidence in myself. It gave me confidence in others that others can also because I see it over and over. I saw it in myself. I saw it in my clients that, that you people do have the power within to overcome what is thrown at them in.
They might not always know how, they might need a little bit of help but it comes from them. And, with hypnosis, I, the in, it was a, I guess I, I will call it just such an insight and shift in looking at things. It, didn't just change the worrying part. It, changed so many elements of my life. And I love that. I see that in clients, they come for one thing and it can resolve that one thing, and then the unexpected is all these other things they see you.
Erika: Can you tell us about a client story that, where that's happened, tell us, share with us a client when maybe
Mary: I'll share a client that I'm working with right now.
When I first had the consultation there was a bit of a delay between the time I talked with her to when I could get her into my schedule. Okay. And she was she was in a lot of anguish, real anguish on in some things in her life. And I just wanted to, I wanted to help. I knew I couldn't, I just wasn't able to work her in for a while.
And I'll tell you what we did, but I gave her a tool, right then. She came to the first session already. This was, she was in a difficult program and the person that was the, her professor was was not being fair to her. She's an older student and she didn't know herself. Is that, am I just thinking she's not or is she not?
And it might have been a, and actually what she says, I think it was a little of both, but that was really the thing. She said, I need to get through this program. I'm so intimidated and angry in it. Okay. And I just wanna not go to class. I want to not do it. I wanna stop. Here's what's happening now, this is, I've seen her three times we've worked together and she's, and she uses all the techniques that we go over, she use, she's taken, takes 'em right in and uses it, which is amazing.
Erika: But what was the first one you taught her? The first. The first one that you were talking about? Yeah.
Mary: The consultation was every day and every way. I am better and better. Émile Coué, we taking, I use that very, that's probably one of that's probably one of my favorite tools.
I do things with the technique to make that I think help make it even more powerful. But that she, from the time that's, what I gave her. I said to use it when she starts filling it, and I said 10 times at night before she goes to sleep, use her fingers to keep. Every day and every way I am better and better.
She, with that tool alone, she came to the first session with ready to work on more, knowing that it will work and feeling but, feeling somewhat better, quite a bit better. Good. Awesome. And the last time suggestion, right? Oh yeah. The last time she came, she. She looked good. She was sitting up tall. She wasn't she was excited. She wa it was, the transformation was really amazing.
Erika: Good job. So good job to you. And your client. That is that technique every day and every way I get better and better has been used for so many years. Developed by Émile Coué since the 19 hundreds and the reason that they think it worked so well is its simplicity.
Really, when they asked him to develop something, they thought he, he was in academia. They thought he was gonna develop something very rigid and very complex. And instead he developed something so simple and the thinking is that, so people will do it. And that is just such an empower, just an important lesson, for all of us. Codes. because that's, she just needed a little bit of direction. Absolutely. With an auto Absolutely. Suggestion. That was positive and an easy way to follow through.
Mary: Because she was stuck. She felt very stuck. Very stuck and very, a high level of anguish.
Erika: So that's what we teach right, as the simplest form of self-hypnosis. Every day in every way, I get better and. Every day and every way I get better and better. And pretty soon our clients, when they do say that 10 times to themselves at night, it starts floating around in their mind and they start saying it to themselves as they're walking around their life.
Mary: That's it. That's exactly what happens to, my clients and to me. I use it myself. I do. The other thing that I've done with it is, and I have a recording with this on my website that can be downloaded. And it's just the, recording is six minutes, I think. But is I take that, and this is, I was just putting this all together with the research I've done in neuroscience and neurobiology and I, I take that, and this is also part of what is done with, I made a very small part, but with the seventh path technique is saying that and iterating, but with a pause setting the stage for your subconscious. We're not squishing down emotions, right? We're letting them come up. We have confidence we can handle these emotions. We're not saying only have positive thoughts. We're saying when they come, we're gonna, we're gonna get confidence that we can handle these, we can handle these. And, when you get there, also training your mind. This is basically practice for training your mind for the geno effect. What you focus on is the path that becomes made.
So now we're getting used to something comes up and we say, okay, we acknowledge. And then we can shift our focus to some, to something that's more positive. And yeah, doing that, the importance I think of doing that every day is many reasons, but one of which, just so that in some situation where you're not even using that auto suggest, you say, okay, I see that it came up and now, I'm gonna go on to my positive way that I'm gonna live my life.
Does that make sense?
Erika: Yeah, because what happens is we're just witnessing what's coming up emotionally or in our mind. We know we're not our thoughts and that pause, and that's what's the most important thing we are able to give ourselves and our clients. That moment of pause where we're not having a knee-jerk reaction, where we're not feeling compelled to have to get angry or upset or drink or smoke or whatever. Absolutely. We are doing to, fix that, right? So it gives us control back and that's what is so important for our clients because that's what they notice. They don't wanna feel so out of control all the time. And what a lot of our clients end up doing is they end up isolating themselves or limiting their life. They won't go to the party because will be there. Yeah. They might get too upset. They won't go on the hike or they won't go on the thing because they don't wanna get in an argument or they're so our clients start limiting their life. Because of these difficult situations, difficult scenarios, they might start coping strategies to address them.
And what you're teaching is for them to know. They can just still be okay. They're not gonna die. Nothing bad's gonna happen.
Mary: And enjoy that height. Remember when you're on a hike, what's around you? Nature, everything that so much that you can spend your focus on. It's nature. There's just you don't have to. Yes, whoever. If it's this person or a situation that you don't like, yeah, they might be there, but look at how much else there that you love.
Erika: So it's brain training, it's heart training. nervous system training. Yes, it is allowing us to be more comfortable in this home that we call our body.
Exactly. Infectiousness. Hypnosis gives us really a way to get at a root cause. It really, it reveals the truth. It gets rid of all of the noise and chatter that our conscious mind likes to bring in of things that aren't true. So we. To the truth, but once we're at the truth, we can understand why the brain is making certain decisions.
Those habits. Habits of thought. Habits of behavior. And then we get to make changes. We can understand, oh, I know. I can see why it's happening. Let's put in a new upgrade there. Understand an right. Yeah. Good.
So how do you live Hypnotically? Do you personally live Hypnotically Mary?
Mary: Yes, and it's interesting cause you had just brought something up and it made me think, and this happened specifically last night. I'll give an example, , because I have been, I have a lot that I wanna accomplish in a short period of time right now and I have, and it, I went to bed and it was going through my mind, going through my mind, and I thought, and my first thought was my brain is racing so much. There's no way that I can do my seventh past practice. Just gave yourself a suggestion. Wait, this is time to do your seventh pass practice. And. And starting it. And sure enough, right there, and I think I got through two recognitions and I fell asleep and my mind became yes, but, and that's, really the, and I think I, characterize it as a worrying that, racing of thought I have, I do have a lot of thoughts coming on in my mind, going on in my mind.
Erika: Yeah. Got a good brain and that's got a good brain. That's what it does.
Mary: But sometimes it gets feeling a little bit like an on-ramp to a freeway where there's so much, where there's so much there and things get a little congested, but then a stop, go, stop, go. And I know that's not good and hypnosis doing, whether it's the seventh path, whether it's every day, whether it's the deep breath. Yeah. Whether it's the auto suggestion. It's just allowed me to say, get that. Wait Take, a moment here. Get control back. And then you can take a moment. It doesn't, it doesn't even have to. It doesn't have to be an hour. It can be minutes. It can be seconds.
Erika: When you practice it enough, it is seconds.
When you first start practicing it, it might, and I think this is an important point, it's just like anything, when we start something new, it's, it can feel awkward, it can feel strange. You might not get as good a results as you'd like. And sometimes we get fantastic results at first. But, really just a few even seconds of respite, seconds of nothingness and seconds of elimination or dissipation of the, heaviness of the daily stress and worry is so powerful and good for our nervous system. And what we find is our clients when we can give them an awesome session in hypnosis where they're reminded how good feels and we relieve some of that pressure, they're hopeful. . And then when we have 'em go home and practice, it's a little easier, right? And then they start, gaining success and pretty soon they're able to do their self-hypnosis for longer periods of time. They're mo, they're noticing moments of brilliance and peace in their life, right?
So it's a practice, that's why they call it.
Mary: Absolutely. And, it is interesting when, cause as you know, I learned my seventh path technique from you, . And when we were doing that, I remember with the first recognition when we did it, and part of it is you asked, does anyone wanna share? And this was in a group situation and you said, does anyone wanna share their echoes?
Were had amazing echos. Yeah. And you know what I had, I felt like quiet and I I felt out echoed by, others who were so creative. And then I, but at first, and then I said, wait a minute, if what I'm getting from Seventh Pass initially is a quieting of the mind, that's a win. And that's what I tell my clients.
Cause clients sometimes start that way and then things Oh yeah. Start to come up And they do. And that did change for me. But that if what, you get initially is the quietness, that's a win. It's not wrong. It's a win.
Erika: Exactly, and that's exactly like if clients fall asleep listening to the relaxation recording or listening to another recording or doing their self hypnosis, if they fall asleep.Good job. A lot of our clients need, to be able to fall asleep without a substance,
Mary: Yes, absolutely. Absolutely.
Erika: So what would you wanna say to one of your clients out there? Potential client, maybe somebody out there thinking maybe they're a little stressed and they're thinking about maybe using hypnosis.
What would you wanna say to them?
Mary: I would say that the best way to start with hypnosis is if possible, to work with a hypnotist. Prefer, prefer, preferably I think a hypnotist trained in five path, but there's a lot of really good hypnotist out there. So it can be referral, it can be Google reviews.
It can be, but but do some research and find a, hypnotist that has some good referrals and has good training and, start with that and make sure that you're going to, that, that to know, that it's not just about the work that you do in the session, it's the techniques that you are learning so that independently you have the practice for life to help yourself.
Erika: Yeah, good point. Good point. I, Oh, I was just gonna ask you, what kind of clients are you tending to work a lot with? Is there a particular issue or problem that tends to come through your door?
Mary: I do get a number of clients for stop smoking to become non for stop smoking.
Yeah. Yeah. And I've done I've done. A lot of additional research in, addition to what I had, because I want that to be as effective as it possibly can so that we have the complete recipe for success. And I talk to my clients before and make sure that, they're on board with me, that we're working together. I'm not a magician, but I have really good techniques And smoking. Yeah. Can be stop smoking can be much can be an easy thing. It what,
Erika: how much do you find that? And, how much do you find that level of kind of being open about the technique and, our client's role in it, meaning they don't just get to sit there and do nothing? How important do you think that discussion is to have with your clients?
Mary: I think it's essential. I, and I, and it took some confidence in myself to be able to do, to have that and now I need, unless I have the agreement from the client that they will in addition to the work that we do one-on-one, listen to and incorporate the techniques that Yeah the, powerful techniques that they're gonna going to learn that will be based on what their needs are.
Because people smoke, stop smoking in different ways, and I need a commitment that they will use them.
Erika: So the commitment is they will use the tech, they will do the work with you, but then also implement the techniques, whatever they might be that you find are best for them, they're gonna practice and implement those techniques. They agree to that. As part of even signing up with you. You tell 'em how this is gonna go, right?
Mary: I do. And I say you will be able to, if there's any anything I cover in my sessions, I always follow up with session notes so it'll be clear. And if anything is ever not. Then don't, wait till our next session. Reach out. Reach out and get clarification.
Erika: Okay. And you like to teach them the every day and every way I get better and better. And I know you have a book coming out. Why don't you, why don't you tell everybody about your book? Because I think there's gonna be some more techniques right?In the book that you probably teach your client, right?
Mary: Yes, I have a book that's called elevate Your. Elevate your happiness. Elevate your happiness. And the subtitle is Science-Based Natural Techniques for the DIYer. Beautiful. And each of the techniques that we, that. That are discussed there. I give a introduction to the techniques and the steps. I also give a way to turn it off a notch , so that ok.
Erika: Okay. So like the advanced version or something. Okay.
Mary: Absolutely. Absolutely. There's ways of turning it up. A not, and I said let's, the people who have results, of course, they're gonna want the next version of it.
Erika: They're gonna wanna know how to apply the expert version, right?
Mary: Absolutely. Yes. Yeah. Yes. So I wanna have the clear technique that they can just start right now. And then we wanna say, here's some more things that you can, do with that.
And I also share how I personally, what I. There's a, this is what I do section and how I incorporate the technique. Sometimes it's the turn it up a not part of it. Sometimes the tech, there, there are some cases I don't do, I do I don't do all the techniques perfectly, and when I don't, I let them know this is the part that I know it's important and I struggle. So I and I let them know that I think it's important to be honest about, that part too.
Erika: Yeah, of course.
Mary: Yeah. And then I do also in part two of the book. I look at some of the traditional and alternative therapies and techniques that are out there, and just give a little bit of background, just so, they can find it in one spot. Where, those things are with the trusted source.
And I also talk about the use of hypnosis to promote wellness and what hypnosis is, what it is not, how it's used, that that kind of thing. And give the information, okay. For myself, but letting 'em know it's not just me. There's a lot of really good hypnotists out there.
Erika: Good. What, else would you want your clients to know, or somebody who's your potential client out there, what would you want them to know right now?
Mary: I want them to know that they may not realize it at this time, but with a little bit of help, they have the solutions are within themselves.
That they have and I can help. I will work with them to get their insights that are needed, but they already know, they know what to do and there's some work that we can do that helps them to uncover that. Yeah. And, be able to move forward. I want people to have a better quality of life, and it really is.
It's possible. And it's possible, yeah. Quickly and powerfully. And hypnosis, it doesn't take long. Hypnosis just helps. It just helps move that forward so much. It's a, it's just an efficient technique.
Erika: Good. And what about being a hypnotist? Do you like being a hypnotist?
Mary: I love being a hypnotist. Yeah.
Erika: So what would you say to anybody thinking about being a hypnotist?
Mary: Oh yeah. I'd say it is. It's life-changing in the very first client that you work with. When you think you've, just learned this and you your, own confidence inside may feel may feel like, wow, I can't believe I'm doing this. There's so much. And then you see the relief that the help you give your client and you go, wow, this is just getting started.
I'm, effective right now. I. I know how to help them to help themselves have a better life. Yeah. And if it, changes people’s life. You make it you, make positive changes in person, after person. Their life is better and don't you think of their life as better then the people around them that their life is also better.
Yeah. And, that's what you're able to do and make money while you're doing it and have a successful. Absolutely. That you have cont… that you have control of . Yeah. Yeah.
You gotta help people while making money.
Yep. It's, important. I was I am not putting down being a software developer because the it was a, good career. It was good. And I was interested in solving the problems in technology. This is important work. Important. Just and, it feels, it, it just is. It's fantastic. Personally. Just, it's amazing.
Yes. I recommend it.
Erika: It's, it is, yeah. It's amazing to help people in such big ways when they've been struggling for so long and they don't think there's a solution, really good job. Mary. I'm so proud of you. You grew your business really quickly. Thank you. A lot of people tell everybody about how they can connect with you. What's your website? What's the name of your business?
Mary: Okay. My the name of my, website is ClearPathHypnosis.com. Okay, and my company name is Clear Path Hypnosis and I do have a home office based in Petkoski, Michigan. And I also see, I've probably seen. 80 to 90% of my clients I see online very successfully. It works very well. It works really though.
Nice and oh good.
So I, see both and that's how the best way to get ahold of me is ClearPathHypnosis.com and that has all the, email and phone number. Any other way that you would like to reach out to me
Erika: Awesome. Awesome. And your book Elevate Your Happiness, is that right? Elevate Your Happiness. When is that coming out?
Mary: It's due, I believe it will come out by mid-March. Mid-March with that. Of this year. Okay, very good. We will look 2023.
Erika: Yes. Awesome. Yeah. Congratulations Mary, thank you so much for being here on Living Hypnotically, where we share tips and tools from professional hypnotists on the application of hypnosis.
And what a delight to have. Mary Hayes here today. She's a successful hypnotist helping people. In so many cool ways, taking her skills. She's got a book coming out, so please visit her and I'll make sure to put her content below and on on this video. Thank you, Mary so much, and bye everyone for now.
Mary: Thanks for having me, Erika.
Erika: Get the book. Start hypnotizing. Get the book and first hypnosis lesson free now, at CanYouBeAHypnotist.com.